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| Management Tools |
| Office Conflict: An opportunity to hone your management skills |
Someone has said “it’s impossible to showcase your ignorance when your mouth is shut.” That’s great advice for leaders who have a sincere interest in learning how to manage people more effectively, particularly when employees have disagreements that raise the level of stress in your office. Listening is a vital skill.
Most of us are quick to dismiss office conflicts as a “burr under the management saddle,” but wise leaders recognize that emotion-charged office battles can be superb leadership training experiences—as long as a few simple rules are observed:
Rule 1: LISTEN. Get the whole story (from both sides) without interrupting or making judgments. Re-phrase the important parts of the story back to the employee to make sure you have not misunderstood.
Rule 2: RESIST THE TEMPTATION TO GET INVOLVED UNNECESSARILY. After you have listened, ask yourself, “Does this confrontation involve me or my responsibilities directly?” If not, you might accomplish more by saying, “You have clearly been wronged, and I respect your maturity enough to trust that you will be able to work it out in a professional way without my interference.”
Rule 3: DEPERSONALIZE THE CONFLICT. If you must get involved, make it a point to help the combatants adopt an “us versus the problem” frame of mind, and avoid battles that are “me versus you.”
Rule 4: AGREE ON TIME AND PLACE. Anyone involved in a conflict that will require extended discussion deserves the opportunity to choose when and where he or she would like to attempt a resolution. Don’t confront an employee in front of other co-workers, when she’s with a client, or while she’s working on a deadline, for example. Chose a time and place when you can concentrate exclusively on the problem at hand.
Rule 5: UNDERSTAND THAT SOME CONFLICTS AREN’T JUST CONFLICTS. When the situation entails accusations of sexual, racial or ethnic conflict, or if it is the result of inappropriate behavior, you are dealing with harassment, not office conflict, so the rules change. Discuss these problems with supervisors or the human resource department.
Source: Stöppler, Melissa C., M.D. “Communication Tips for a Healthy Workplace.” www.About.com. 9 September, 2003. 22 March 2005. http://stress.about.com/cs/workplacestress/a/aa090903a.htm
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